Death Dealers: Kate Beckinsale's got nothing on me. (July 5, 2007)
One of my best friends made a comment once that I've been thinking about a lot lately. She said that I was good at dealing with death. I suppose it's because I held up an image of strength through the losses of a different best friend, a stepfather and a young aunt all to various forms of cancer these past few years. It could also be due to the horrific deaths of strangers that I was unfortunate enough to witness over the course of my life, from an algae-covered child's severed head being fished out of a canal to a pedestrian knocked into traffic and flattened with graphic detail as I sat at a red light. Throw in the mass amounts of Stephen King novels I've read and wide array of horror movies that I've watched, and I guess it's a pretty accurate statement to describe my often solemn demeanor.
The mystery that I may never solve is if I've become this way due to my experiences, or if this is my nature and The Universe intentionally put me in these places with the awareness that I could handle it. Is it destiny/fate/luck... or has it been conditioned into my personality?
Regardless, a less personal form of my dealing with death was handed to me at my job just over a year ago. No one at the office seemed to have time to handle the "Dead People Files," so I inherited the responsibility of researching and handling all of our probate cases. Most of the time, the death certificates I order and review show causes of death as cancer and heart failure. Though, every once in a while I get a suicide or homicide. Two days ago I researched a file where a man had committed suicide on New Year's Eve of 2005. The cause of death was "Self inflicted gun shot wound to the chest" and another that I'm working on today involves a double homicide of a south Florida couple in their fifties who were gunned down by their son-in-law. I haven't reached the point where I get to actually talk to the heirs to their estates and advise them of the foreclosure I'm about to serve them papers on, but my guess is that they aren't going to be very happy about it... especially the daughter of the couple who's late husband was the cause of their death. I don't know if many people in my office would handle this type of research as well as I seem to be able to. It helps me get through the paperwork to think that I have this job for a reason.
Being a magnet to death isn't all dark and gloomy, though. I think I may have found yet another calling. I've been invited to be a "Law Angel". My co-worker Maribel asked me to join her in a volunteer group for Give Kids The World. Apparently, they've got a sick kid ranch out in Kissimmee where terminally ill children can go to have a free Disney-like vacation and the next big day that they need help running the rides, serving ice cream, etc. is next Sunday the 22nd. If anyone can take a dying child on a pony ride without bursting into tears, it's me... so I think I'm going to sign myself up. Cheers to being aware of the darkness, but having to ability to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel, right?
P.S. To concerned friends: I'm not in a dark, depressed place... so don't get scared by this entry. I've got happy stuff to blog about, too. I just only have enough time to address one thought train at a time. There will be lots more reading material posted in the coming days.
The mystery that I may never solve is if I've become this way due to my experiences, or if this is my nature and The Universe intentionally put me in these places with the awareness that I could handle it. Is it destiny/fate/luck... or has it been conditioned into my personality?
Regardless, a less personal form of my dealing with death was handed to me at my job just over a year ago. No one at the office seemed to have time to handle the "Dead People Files," so I inherited the responsibility of researching and handling all of our probate cases. Most of the time, the death certificates I order and review show causes of death as cancer and heart failure. Though, every once in a while I get a suicide or homicide. Two days ago I researched a file where a man had committed suicide on New Year's Eve of 2005. The cause of death was "Self inflicted gun shot wound to the chest" and another that I'm working on today involves a double homicide of a south Florida couple in their fifties who were gunned down by their son-in-law. I haven't reached the point where I get to actually talk to the heirs to their estates and advise them of the foreclosure I'm about to serve them papers on, but my guess is that they aren't going to be very happy about it... especially the daughter of the couple who's late husband was the cause of their death. I don't know if many people in my office would handle this type of research as well as I seem to be able to. It helps me get through the paperwork to think that I have this job for a reason.
Being a magnet to death isn't all dark and gloomy, though. I think I may have found yet another calling. I've been invited to be a "Law Angel". My co-worker Maribel asked me to join her in a volunteer group for Give Kids The World. Apparently, they've got a sick kid ranch out in Kissimmee where terminally ill children can go to have a free Disney-like vacation and the next big day that they need help running the rides, serving ice cream, etc. is next Sunday the 22nd. If anyone can take a dying child on a pony ride without bursting into tears, it's me... so I think I'm going to sign myself up. Cheers to being aware of the darkness, but having to ability to focus on the light at the end of the tunnel, right?
P.S. To concerned friends: I'm not in a dark, depressed place... so don't get scared by this entry. I've got happy stuff to blog about, too. I just only have enough time to address one thought train at a time. There will be lots more reading material posted in the coming days.
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